Overheard in Glasgow…

27 Feb

True story.

“Came in the other day, didn’t have any baccy”

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah”.

“Managed to get some off Tim. Wanna know what I gave him in return?”

“Go on then”

“A tin of sardines.”

“Sardines?”

“Yeah, apparently they’re nice on toast. Bit too oily for me but.”

“Why did you give him the sardines?”

“Don’t like ’em.”

“Why did you buy the sardines?”

“Found ’em. I was in Lidl, see”

“Yeah. Lidls in town was it?”

“That’s the one. I was packing my shopping, and I saw a bag that had been left”

“And the sardines were in the bag, were they?”

“Yeah, must’ve been about five or six cans. This bloke must have loved his sardines.”

The two old men sip their drinks.

“Not just sardines, but there was some oxtail soup as well, and a 4 pack of Stella. Loads of stuff, Jaffa Cakes, shampoo, easily a tenners worth”.

“Reckon he forgot to take the bag?

“Reckon he was a shoplifter”

“Why would a shoplifter leave a bag behind?”

“Security guard must’ve spotted him. Must’ve dumped the bag, and legged it”

“So you took the bag then?”

*chuckles* “Yeah!”

The two old men sip their pints.

“Fucking awful, that Stella”

“Yeah. Not even worth nicking”.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: