Me vs Frankie Boyle.

27 Aug
  1. willmill82
    Given that Frankie Boyle’s on the telly, it’s probably the right time to tell you all the story of how I once ran into him.
  2. willmill82
    I used to have a job, you see, that started at 4 in the afternoon. Despite having a massive lie in, one afternoon I was running late.
  3. willmill82
    So there I am. Realising that it was coming up to 3.30, I duly threw on my work clothes and legged it to Partick train station.
  4. willmill82
    It is also worth noting that, at the time, I lived atop Gardner Street, the steepest hill in the bloody world!
  5. willmill82
    I ran down the hill. Running down steep hills, as it turns out, is a really stupid idea, as it’s difficult to stop for unforeseen obstacles.
  6. willmill82
    I’m sure I don’t need to explain to you what (or indeed who) the unexpected obstacle was. However, just in case I do, it was Frankie Boyle.
  7. willmill82
    Well, Frankie Boyle and child. I guess at that time of day, they were returning from the kid’s primary school. I must have been going 30mph.
  8. willmill82
    For those of you who don’t know what I look like, I’m a heavy chap. No-one needs a fat bloke running at them at 30mph. Especially not comics
  9. willmill82
    So I’m dashing around the corner of Gardner St (steep) onto Dumbarton Road (flat). I am inches away from colliding with two Boyles.
  10. willmill82
    Luckily, I am able to apply the brakes. “So sorry, in a rush”, I mumble. I do a double take. “Frankie Boyle!” I mutter under my breath.
  11. willmill82
    He looked different from on Mock the Week. He had a shit beard. Not too dis-similar to the one on telly now.
  12. willmill82
    Frankie, understandably, looked shocked. A fat man had nearly collided with him. As shocked as a Mail reader who had read one of his jokes.
  13. willmill82
    That all said, I did make it to work on time, and no-one was hurt, so all’s well that ends well. Moral of the story: Look where you’re going

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