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Minicos: Radio Pedentry

15 Jun

To be honest, I probably could have just tweeted, but we’re here now, so let’s crack on!

Short and sweet, this is an open message to Absolute Radio 90s, and their “No Repeat Guarantee”.

Dear Absolute 90s,
Given you have a policy of playing tunes from the 1990s, and not repeating them, can you please explain to me why you play Morrissey’s 1989 hit “Last of the International Playboys” ad fucking nauseum?
Don’t get me wrong, it’s a good tune, and I apprieciate your guarantee only extends to seven hours of the day, but give it a rest won’t you?
You could always substitute it for one of his other eighties hits, you know. What about Everyday Is Like Sunday? I’ve never heard you play that, and we love that song here on the Explainin’ the Cosmos.
Anyway, I’ve said my bit. Sort it out!

Mini-Cos: Ba ba ba ba baaa

2 Feb

I’m lovin’ it.

That’s right, I’m loving “it”.

It, if you remember, is what we called sex when we were between the ages of roughly 7 to 12. (Age spread may differ depending on location, social class, and dirtyness of young mind).

So McDonald’s slogan basically means, to a young’un, I’m loving sex.

Hang on…

No, of course it doesn’t. That’s absurd. Scratch all of the above from your mind. It’s McDonald’s. There’s no way they could possibly mean that. They sell burgers and chips, not filth and bukkake.

That said, McDonald’s also did THIS ADVERT (thanks, Sky News) where they claim that a “Bob”, in monetary value, is the equivalent of a pound, poond, quid, spondoolick, or 100 pence. They are wrong. A “bob” is a shilling, 5 new pence, 12 old pence, or a twentieth of a British EuroDollar. In essence, they got the meaning of the word WRONG.

And if they got that word wrong, how do we know they haven’t got other words or phrases wrong as well?

“Ba ba ba ba baaa, I’m lovin’ it” just got that little bit more sinister from where I’m sitting.